Random thoughts thread

Man, Friday could not have come sooner. Anyone got weekend plans?

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Backlash wrote

Man, Friday could not have come sooner. Anyone got weekend plans?

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Friday plan. Just got home from night shift 1am. I will eat pizza and drink beer. As for the rest of the weekend? Wake me up on monday, I will sleep.

Went out with friends. It's amazing how 5 hours of hanging out completely and utterly exhausts me. I just want to curl up and recharge now.

I set a goal for myself. I struggled, managed to troubleshoot and completed my goal. Today is a good day.

tftp wrote

really pining for the past these days

Keep the faith, darlin'. Brighter days will visit us all, in time.

Angel wrote

I have my daughter for about a month 😃

That's awesome, love! I'm so happy for you both. <3

Loko wrote

i really hope my coworkers or managers don't give me shit since i'm clocking in while i'm sick

Don't go sick to work. Ya big meanie

I finally was able to put an observation about myself into words the other day.

I've always been supremely attracted to people, either romantically or otherwise, who are outcasts, loners, losers, weirdos, freaks, autists, etc. I remember in high school I tried to make friends with a girl who had some issues (not sure exactly what they were, but she clearly had something like aspergers and also scoliosis) and people thought that I was extraordinarily kind and doing some kind of charity work because of it, but I never thought of it like that. I was just interested in people who were "outside of the norm" in some way. Even today most of my friends online are outsiders and loners and my IRL friends, if not complete loners, are at least unusual/weeb/nerd/etc. to some capacity. I just find that those people have more interesting perspectives on the world to me and generally more similar hobbies to myself.

But it has a bad effect too. I'm an unusually empathetic person and other people's negative emotions "stick" to me far too easily. And, unfortunately, people who are loners/outcasts/nerds tend to be very cynical, depressed, and negative. It's hard when people with the best taste in things always tend to be interpersonally depressing. I'm not a very optimistic person; in fact I'd say I'm rather cynical, but I know that depressing thoughts can be suicidal for my well-being, so I've had to develop a kind of brainwashed optimism. But it's hard, it feels like all I've done is shelter myself more and more.

So how do I keep making friends with the weirdos, the outcasts, the scummy NEET weebs, without becoming intensely depressed? I don't know, but I need to find some way. It's better than being friends with a bunch of NPCs, that's for sure.

Stayed up all night not feeling well. I can only imagine this'll fuck my sleep schedule up but good. At least I made my steam profile look nice and caught up on all the youtube videos in existence? Lol

I had one of those dreams where you're in a happy and wonderful relationship, doing relationship things, being playful and having fun. But, then you suddenly wake up and the crippling depression grabs hold of you and you're smothered in the cool dampness of your bedroom as you lie there knowing that that was probably the highlight of your day and it was all made up.

Loko wrote
seel wrote

I had one of those dreams where you're in a happy and wonderful relationship, doing relationship things, being playful and having fun. But, then you suddenly wake up and the crippling depression grabs hold of you and you're smothered in the cool dampness of your bedroom as you lie there knowing that that was probably the highlight of your day and it was all made up.

those are the worst. i hope your day has some nice highlights to it

i had a slice of chällerhocker cheese by itself that i bought at wegman's and it was so funky
i feel sick but it was worth it

Eh, I played Forager for 8 hours. And had fun, so I guess that was the actual highlight.

However, I had yet another dream with the same situation. pepeHands

seel wrote

I had one of those dreams where you're in a happy and wonderful relationship, doing relationship things, being playful and having fun. But, then you suddenly wake up and the crippling depression grabs hold of you and you're smothered in the cool dampness of your bedroom as you lie there knowing that that was probably the highlight of your day and it was all made up.

I think I had the complete opposite of that this morning. What's happened to me a lot recently is I have a dream where bad, embarassing or saddening things happen to me only for me to realize during all this that it's all just a dream. That moment of clarity is always the point where I wake up. It's not pleasant to experience the dream but I've really come to appreciate just how wonderful of a feeling it is to wake up from a bad dream and remember that everything is fine.

Fell asleep 8pm on a friday. Feels like a waste... but alright I did wake up 5am yesterday.

Was in a rush of excitement to reach 1000 posts but for last 2 weeks seems I am not into it

Angel wrote

Was in a rush of excitement to reach 1000 posts but for last 2 weeks seems I am not into it

At this rate I'm gonna reach the 1k mark before you do. Fu fu~