Make one of your favorite games sound as shitty as possible

you spin until you win

the spoiler
diablo 3 and/or league of legends

fly around as a silver guy killing everything with your snail trail
marvel heroes

Kill everyone for a girl that don't have sex with u
bioshock infinite

mumu wrote

Kill everyone for a girl that don't have sex with u
bioshock infinite

At least the internet makes up for it :>

malmon73 wrote
mumu wrote

Kill everyone for a girl that don't have sex with u
bioshock infinite

At least the internet makes up for it :>

dam..... thas tru

You're a writer who goes on holiday, but then your wife gets kidnapped and a story you wrote but don't remember comes true, so you have to go around killing stuff in a forest with a flashlight.

Alan Wake

5 days later

You get your shit killed by a giant wolf

Hyperdimension Neptunia
Your sister gets her shit killed by a giant wolf
Hyperdimension Neptunia II
You're taken to another dimension, to get your shit killed by a wolf in an extremely long game
Hyperdimension Neptunia V
You're killing shit this time Sengoku Mousou style
Hyperdimension Neptunia Action U
You're gonna arrive to Steam soon
Megadimension Neptunia VII

7 days later

80% weeb bait 20% references

Hyperdimension Neptunia series.

Also I apparently didn't read the post above gg self

12 days later

Let's see, everything has an obnoxious orange tint, the hundreds of NPCs all share the same four or five voice actors and stare unblinkingly at you during conversations, one of the factions got gimped hard with cut content and it boasts free exploration while road-blocking everything behind high-level enemies.

You're an alien, and you have to fend off giant monsters by throwing plants at them while also collecting a bunch of junk that's scattered all over the place.  Also, you're timed, and if you don't get the stuff before the time runs out, you lose.

11 days later

You kidnap literally everything and force a girl who can't talk into subservience all while stealing everyone's nukes.

Also parasites.

16 days later

An FPS with no single-player mode, a garish cartoony artstyle, and the most annoying mascot this side of the Atlantic. The story involves a team of battle-hardened former mercenaries getting back together to fight some vaguely-specified terrorists. The game is obsessed over by /v/irgins, who paradoxically bash every facet of the game into oblivion.

Overwatch.

You talk, yeah that's right, just talk. How much talking is I'm this game? Entire trees and networks of dialogue trees. Even when you do get to some combat, all you do is hit a button and watch your character do the move instead. LAME.

Were you too unhealthy to join the military?

Are you barely able to hit the broad side of a barn with a firearm?

Can't read a map to save your life?

Well, now you have the opportunity to see just how miserably you would have failed in this exciting, next-generation shooter!

  • Enjoy the soothing sounds of your own wheezing as you struggle to run up a hill wearing a full vest and ruck!

- Experience sensational migraines from missing any target further out than 500 meters!

  • Cower in utter terror as your enemies outmaneuver you using drones and strafe your position with 30mm gatling cannons and high-explosive rockets!

All this and more, in:

ArmA III

Nodoudt wrote

Were you too unhealthy to join the military?

Are you barely able to hit the broad side of a barn with a firearm?

Can't read a map to save your life?

Well, now you have the opportunity to see just how miserably you would have failed in this exciting, next-generation shooter!

  • Enjoy the soothing sounds of your own wheezing as you struggle to run up a hill wearing a full vest and ruck!

- Experience sensational migraines from missing any target further out than 500 meters!

  • Cower in utter terror as your enemies outmaneuver you using drones and strafe your position with 30mm gatling cannons and high-explosive rockets!

All this and more, in:

ArmA III

Sounds like a hell of a time. Too bad my graphics card would melt trying to run it.

Backlash wrote
Nodoudt wrote

Were you too unhealthy to join the military?

Are you barely able to hit the broad side of a barn with a firearm?

Can't read a map to save your life?

Well, now you have the opportunity to see just how miserably you would have failed in this exciting, next-generation shooter!

  • Enjoy the soothing sounds of your own wheezing as you struggle to run up a hill wearing a full vest and ruck!

- Experience sensational migraines from missing any target further out than 500 meters!

  • Cower in utter terror as your enemies outmaneuver you using drones and strafe your position with 30mm gatling cannons and high-explosive rockets!

All this and more, in:

ArmA III

Sounds like a hell of a time. Too bad my graphics card would melt trying to run it.

This video sums up the hyper-realistic madness quite well.

Nodoudt wrote
Backlash wrote
Nodoudt wrote

Were you too unhealthy to join the military?

Are you barely able to hit the broad side of a barn with a firearm?

Can't read a map to save your life?

Well, now you have the opportunity to see just how miserably you would have failed in this exciting, next-generation shooter!

  • Enjoy the soothing sounds of your own wheezing as you struggle to run up a hill wearing a full vest and ruck!

- Experience sensational migraines from missing any target further out than 500 meters!

  • Cower in utter terror as your enemies outmaneuver you using drones and strafe your position with 30mm gatling cannons and high-explosive rockets!

All this and more, in:

ArmA III

Sounds like a hell of a time. Too bad my graphics card would melt trying to run it.

This video sums up the hyper-realistic madness quite well.

Aye, I played the original Operation Flashpoint. Fun stuff back in the day; even now, it's still got its charm.